I dont rmb myself being like that in the past.

I think I was a cheerful and happy girl. And until the worse relationship strikes on me. It affects me a lot along with competitiveness and confidence issues.

Upon graduation I felt real schemening sides of people and I dislike it.

I am devastated. I want to numb myself with everything and, I am in great loss.
I dont know how to describe this emotional devastation.

I need a break, I really need a break.

But no one fucking understands what the hell am i going through, am i feeling.