Maybe i'm contradictin myself. I dont know.
I dont want, I want.

I dont want you to forget this,
But I want, because i dont want you to be suffering.
I dont want to drag the time. So let it go, as soon as possible. Before I myself stop myself to. I wouldnt want - because "I dont want to let go" , and torture you more.

So I let it all, all go.

I miss you so so much.
But all gone.
They are words of haste - But, still, you must be responsible for it .

What's more, Really tired.
I betrayed.
I broke the promise.
I've hurt you badly.
...
...
...
I know I know.

That's why i said you're in agony.
That's why i wanted to end your agony.
That's why i wanted to stop your sufferin.
Maybe its all, really over.

-
都是因为我太爱你
我好想你, 我还必须面带笑容的说，
我不在乎。

My worse day over recent bad days.

Earrrrrrrrrly in the mornin just being scolded/shouted by someone.

-6+am also early in the morning woke up and bathed. Sms-ed and left no much time for other things, Realised my dont-know-what button seems like coming out, so i cut it off. have to cut another one on another side bcuz its in pair.

Cut it off leavin on hole on my uniform . DAMN IT. Dont care - rushed rushed rushed. Social studies result got 3 over dont know how much. I think i failed for the test. AHH DAMN !

pigu pigu then pigu, school ended and i went home alone - walked to bus 159 (met no one), waited for bus and realised my bag was a bit... "fat" ? So adjusted things inside to make it not so "fat". Adjust til halfway, bus came.

Panicked omg. I'll have to take hp and poa textbook with me and have to take out wallet. Dont care about the opened bag and grabbed everything - just chiong to bus. AND DAMN, before i even stepped into the bus , thermometer dropped. Picked it up and tabbed my card .

Guess what, NO MONEY WTF, asked bus uncle if got change. He gave me a hand signal tellin me "Never mind.".

ALL PASSENGERS LOOKIN AT ME LA!!!!!!!!
I was the only one aboardin and draggin time + NO ONE alightin ZOMFG.

"Just not my day." I told myself.
Maybe everyday - just one bad day without you.
Imy.

Well, nothin much =)
Just met yan jie ++ after school at 159 bus stop. Gary asked me to join into the taxi, but i refused :D . I dont want be dian teng pao can ! :D

Wheeps so i'm home again ! :D
Home Study Home.

Friends

True friends.
Is whenever you need help, they will be there. Everyone was never there.

I dont know why,
I feel like I'm a dog taggin behind a group . I seem so lonely even when, i'm with someone. And yes i do feel that. I see how my grades improving and how one by one of them gone. I am no one to anyone.

I felt always left out in this group, and felt that i'm just , a dog. I can do nothin when my friends are gone. What can i do ? They are always "we", I am always "I"

All by myself, alone. But who cares? =)

I have none. Unlike the past.

Woooooooooooooooooo !

right now dam itchy,
BCUZ THERE'S FLY IN MY ROOM WTF. __
Stupid fly, zhou kai la.

Hmm yep!
No no no , relax not emo post LOL.

hmm! So got really hyper ? i dont know why LOL. AND YEA YTD I WENT BACK WITH CONTACTS WITH SOME OF MY PRIMARY SCHOOL FRIENDSSSSSSSS. WEEE!

AND OMFG - MONDAY ENGLISH PAPER, SERIOUSLY NOT PREPARED AT ALL. I DONT HAVE THE MOOD TO STUDY C'MON! I feel like dota-ing LOL. Though noob la! okay, so sis bought desktop today, anddddddddddddddd,

THIS FREAKIN GUY NEVER REPLY AGAIN &(@!&)@*!^@&!%@%#!!!! LOL

Yep that's all ! :D
dam dam dam. imy WTF.

Maybe that's how the word "regrets" works.

You find him irritatin for him to rant at you .
You find him annoyin for the quarrels .
Untill you told yourself that one day you gonna leave this irritatin and annoyin guy.

But that wasnt all.
This girl knew he was in agony with her too.
This girl knew that he was tolerating every second with her.
She wanted to end his agony.
She dont want him to be so so so sad over this possibly-everlasting-relationship

Too, she was guilty all along bcuz her parents trust her so so much.

You've got days/months of likin him,
You've been with him for about 4 months.
But it took just one day - and its over.

He was gone and then you realised how important he was.

Humans tend to not cherish the things they had,
Until it was gone.

I knew this all along but i never had a chance to feel for it myself.
Sometimes its not that humans are being inconsiderate, its just that they do not know how it feels to be like.

Now I know.
Too late.我好想你

Over and it is.
i
Sorry. really, sorry.
my
________________________________
Right,
nothin much today.

-A MATHS GONNA MAKE ME CRAZY!
-Only saw chan minh background =(
-pplssssssss asking why why why


-Well, i was acting all the while.

FIRSTLY.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANNNNNNNNNNNN !!!

Early in the mornin got scolded and head off to amk library, Yan Jie tutor late man ! Causin us students - Jun wei, Joey, Yee Siang, - to wait for him. =( But nvm! This tutor not bad eh, so, yep its worth waitin? Maybe LOL.

Then went to hougang plaza to meet family. Celebrate ann's b'day. And went to KBOX! :D

Pictures! :

SEE ! EVEN AH MA OKAY! :D




YOU CAN HARDLY SEE THE THREE BROTHERS SINGIN TOGETHER !




Wheeps Together!




Vis Yang Me!




Sing ah sing ah !




WOO, I rmb this. SHOU QIAN ZHE SHOU BU FEN NI WO~~~ SO COOL YEP!




Wheeps family photo!



Wheeeeeee!

Wheeps !

Grandpa recoverin yea ! But seems tired always. Nvm! One day he'll be as energetic like how he was in the past. :D Recently busy with studies? And sleepin. Heh, anyway tired day today, ran 2.4, okay, TIRED ! hah.

AND YEAA, realised pri sch friend - jeremy is one of the char in the drama - A school daze - coming up soon !! WOW. cool seh. :D I give you my support ! :D

Hmm yep! And back to study AGAIN. =)

Omg - was reminded by sis's pm.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY AVIS THE CHIO BU. :D

And woo !

Grandpa seems like recovering ! :D Though still weak, but nvm ! I believe you will fully recover in no time !

So yep, its a short and sweet post again and study for testsssssssssss again . :D

Great,
And it was a really, successful one.

:D happy really.

I can see grandpa still dont bear to leave us. Especially ah ma. Went to hospital and visit him ytd night, grandma too.

Tears , and tears.

For the second time i saw my grandma crying.
For the first time, i saw my grandpa, too.

He's lyin on the bed , weak, very.
Few hours later, i was sittin beside him, very near to him.

I saw his tears, from his eyes, i would say "slowly droppin" ? ( i dont know what's the word ). I wanted to tell him i cant bear him to go. But, i dont know why i , just cant ... Hours later, we were about to go back. We all told him "bye".

My heart, really do ... ache. or rather bitter.

I think, all, afraid that he might leave us, and this might be the last chance to see him, very afraid . We really cant bear and dont want. Avis watchin him for a long time, same for me. We, really cant bear to, we really love him so so much.

Mornin today, afraid to know the result of the operation, really.

But , our love and ... ? - did gave him a chance to succeed in this high risk operation. Phew, lucky really.

Grandpa, we, all dont want you to go,
We all love you.

Went to hospital in the morning.

Doctors had conference with the family, and yes, its obvious that he want us to be prepared for the worst.

Becuz, its either he will be sufferin for the next few weeks / years.
Or
He will be goin for the operation with the high risk of life .

So he chose, to go for the operation.

I dont know what to say, becuz i'm really really confuse, like how the others too. But since he've decided to, we can only pray.

Life maybe,
Born to death?

You're born and you will die.
If you're not born, you wont die.

Its just the matter of time. Everyone will.

Born and death,
Its really really so natural that you wont know when it is.
He/she might be born tml.
He/she might be dead tml.
Whoever knows?

Perhaps we should cherish right now at this moment.
We all know we're born.
We all know we gonna die one day.
Is it... the "process" that matters ?

What's life ?
Start and stop,
Born and die ?
What's happening after you're born, before you die ?

I know he's tired too,
He's sick of it.
Guess, his mind, is that he wants to have the operation and go as fast as possible.
Heard - He said that he dont want ah ma to be so torturin too.

Well,
We'll pray,
We'll pray for it to be a successful one.

Back back back.

Early in the morning , woke up. Bathed & blah, and off to hougang stadium, thought lya and ginna was there, but omg, when i reached there.

So in the end i jogged alone becuz lya was feeling unwell. Take care kay ! =)

Joggged for a while and went back home, and yep. WOO WATCHED DORAEMON !!! :D Then bathed & blah again, went to ys's house there and PUFF! We reached hougang mall interchange ! KFC-ing halfway and yang joined us, WOO. And he even said he wanted to slim down. LOL. Okay he is obviously jiao-ing !

Then gary & jess, then yiling ++, and ++, ++. Left two guys not there - Wi-kiet & the b'day boy. Intend to go K box at first, as i was told by someone. But these late comers had made us to decide on goin lan while waitin.

Halfway through lan, they came. And woo. It was 2/3pm? Shiok hor? When we finished lan its already 4. Not possible to k-box to 7, its just 3 hours my god. Okay , so i missed the main event (k box) whereby they decided to go amk hub and k box from 7 to 10. ( Or maybe not? Not sure). Okay! So my main item was on lan.

Whereby i was called Troll The NOOB. Joey The Burden. Wah lao, i burden also no need liddat one mah =(. In future i 5 minutes own you-s ah! LOL. And too, halfway through lan, sms-ed mum and was told that grandpa had negetive views over his operation. Wasnt really happy throughout the outin though.

Maybe its just a part of life.
Or rather,
It is.

But, the last page of life. Hopefully not or yes?

I dont know.
I dont know,
You're suffering,
We cant bear to. We dont want.

Yet dont know.

How to. How to .

I know he's not recoverin but is even weaker.

But you must know we're always by your side kay. We love you ah gong. Please, I can confirm with you, i will treat you sushi after you're okay, okay ! :D I dont bear you to go, I dont want you to suffer, I'm really confused, you even more i guess, right? Look at the bright side uh. Remember we're all with you, always. by your side. Forever. =)
____________________________________________

Can i ask why the hell am i the one who's always wrong?
What the ,
I really very very very very tired.

Cant you just...
stop it ?

Please okay. Stop it, sorry sorry okay. i got no more energy for these already.

I read my posts, again and again. I know I was being childish (But i dont know why am i acting like that =) ) I then realised I was stupid. I then realised I was really dumb.
I was and I am.

Yes i know, if both of us were to give in, nothin would have happened. But we insist that we're right, and refuse to give in.

12 more days to 4 months.
But can you see, that we're still lack of trust on each other?
If you were to trust me, you wouldnt even bother about a friend i sms-ed - and barely up to 20 msg per day.
If I were to trust you, I wouldnt doubt you for you & your ex.

Good now, you guys had succeed for me to lose contact with a friend - though still upset over this. But there's nothin i can do.

And serious,
I'm not one whom you should love, i'm not worth it , we all know. You're a great guy and you should love the other instead of this stupid and childish girl. Well, lets see how love can break this law of compatible ?
There, though its not a special day or occassion.
I must say, I still love you baby! :D
On the surface you may say, but deep inside too I am ! :D ____________________________________________


Birthday cake? Who is it ? O_O



Yep the super shuai ge Jun Wei! :D



Guys singin song to him eh.

Ah gong ah gong =((

So, dont think he's recovering now. He's in hospital for 18days already. Recover ASAP okay? Ah ma really miss you you know. And we too you know. Jia you yea. We the 10 grandchildrens confirm supporting you one kay? And we'll be with you even after you recovered okay! We miss you ah gong! Come back to home soon okay !

--

Here,

And there, i was accused and Laugh Out Loud. Its my fault for being accused. LOL. What's this? Tell you what.

(Edited) - Becuz i dont wanna quarrel again. =)

---

Alright,
Never mind. Since there's nothin else to do to help. What else?
_______________________________________________

Anyway,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHIN SIN ZOMBIE !
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MR EDWARD !

TEACHERS.

Do you guys hate teachers who are bias towards the smart ones?
Dont have any patience to teach?
super duper kpo ones?

There.

Joeyyyyy says:
what happen?
CHINSIN ; x ] ~ ' (': blahblahblah : p says:
i merely ask her one poa question
CHINSIN ; x ] ~ ' (': blahblahblah : p says:
she scolded for me for not knowing how to do
Joeyyyyy says:
WTF
CHINSIN ; x ] ~ ' (': blahblahblah : p says:
she teach me till halfway , shouted at me
Joeyyyyy says:
SIAO AH

ZOMG ?!

They say : You SHOULD respect teachers.
BUT, sometimes some teachers dont deserve us to respect ! So how do you expect us to really RESPECT them?

Some teachers can teach, and they really can make you understand the wholeeeee chapter. They teaches us and yea we SHOULD respect them. And some greaaaaaat teachers, care for you and concern you, wow that kind if you dont respect them you not human liao.

But sometimes, teachers gets impatient easily and tends to vent anger on students. So, DO THESE TEACHERS STILL DESERVE OUR RESPECT?

I do see cases of teachers abusing their power and scold and shout whenever they want to ( my point of view ). What i really want to say is that some teachers dont even respect students. So how do you expect us, to respect them?

Though teachers are under much much stress stress stress, but if they cant cope with the stress, or they do not have the patience, jolly well quit as a teacher cuz they are not suitable for this job !

Smart people doesnt mean people who can teach well. Right?